ABOUT TWITTER19:54 Nov 20 2009
Times Read: 1,019
I hate Twitter.
HATE. IT.
And yes, I am on Twitter about once or twice a week to check the Twitters, the Tweets, and the Twits.
Or whatever.
And yes, I hate it. I hate every minute of it. For me it's worse than the dumb name -- it's the fact that you're limited to 140 characters. It's like trying to speak via Post-It notes*. I can't believe it has become as popular as it has.
You can't really communicate in 140 characters. All you can do is shout. It's like standing on a street corner and yelling "HEY! Check out this book I'm reading! Look at this thing I stepped in!" -- that's not communication. It's narcissism.
And it's scary.
For example. I thought a porn-star's life would be interesting. Until I read her tweets.
10:13am.... getting my nails done!
11:45am.... eating a steak sandwich!
1:29pm.... flying on a plane to Vegas!
6:33pm.... Now I'm going home.
Zzzzzz... ehhh... any random person is THIS interesting. I suppose that's her point.
And another thing: Chopping up words and sentences to fit 140 characters is rtrd3d. 4 reel, like.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, txt-spk is KILLING communication and written grammar. Killing them.
Twitter is just speeding up the process and making sure it includes as many people as possible.
And god help you if you have a link that takes up most of those 140 digits. Oh sure, you can convert it into a tinyurl, but still. What started off as a simple tweetworthy thing has just turned into work.
Then there's the tweet-hogs who blast me with 11 tweets in 5 minutes. Damn you. My entire wall is filled with YOU and your DAMNED Tweets. It's all about you you YOU. I find it VERY hard to believe that anyone has 11 important updates in 5 minutes.
and if you do that to me, you are SO de-Tweeted from my list. Hear me, Joe Biden?? Ya got that NASCARcupscene?!?
Consider thyself unfollowed!
*slams keyboard into wall*
And all of our clients are convinced they have to have a Twitter feed to communicate their "brand" or their advertising message to their customers.
Oh, really champ?
Yeah, 'cos that's all we need... tweets from Ronald McDonald, Chevrolet, the GEICO lizard, and Chester the Cheet-ohs Cheetah, telling us to trust them and buy their product. WTF??
It's not a communication tool, it's an epidemic.
It's stupidity on crack on steroids.
The fifth horse of the Apocalypse.
But, to me, the worst thing about Twitter is that it's completely useless.
There. I said it.
Useless.
p.s.
You can follow me at:
twiiter.com/ThothLestat
* Post-It &trade Notes are a fine, fine product. I intend no offense at them or the nice people at 3M.
COMMENTS
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chrysanthemia
17:49 Nov 28 2009
Hah. That's amusing--and somewhat true.
deathnitegrl
17:56 Nov 28 2009
hahah this is as much good as the 30 most disturbing Twilight Products.
deathnitegrl
18:07 Nov 28 2009
by the way that site is awesome!
ThothLestat
18:15 Nov 28 2009
there's TONS of funny stuff on it.
Like this.
voodoochile
18:55 Nov 28 2009
I think I saw that yesterday. I cut and pasted it to my daughter, but with some revisions to talk at a 13 y/o level. ;) Good find
Isis101
21:35 Nov 28 2009
Sadly...sooo true. A whole multitude of young girls basically training to become mindless abuse victims...
birra
22:05 Nov 28 2009
That... is outstanding.
Bijou
22:16 Nov 28 2009
LOL i love it
Lolita
23:13 Nov 28 2009
I read that as well... It is one of the best written articles of its type I have read in a while. VV funny.
madamefate
03:09 Nov 29 2009
lol. just remember if the vampire is sparkly..... :P
dabbler
23:25 Nov 29 2009
Oh No They Didn't!